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Still Taking the Long View

For the past year I have been writing about the “3rd Act”. For my purposes I have chosen to divide up the “acts” into 30 year intervals. That being the case the 3rd act is that period of time between the ages of 60 and 90. I realize that there is no actual science for this method, it just works for me. And I also do not want to imply that the 3rd act is the final act. I’m hoping to have a 4th act too!

This no longer seems that unlikely. In an earlier blog I made reference to Ida Keeling, that 100 year old dynamo that is still engaged in track and field events. This is an example of someone who is clearly into a healthy and productive 4th act. As this year winds down I want to highlight another amazing person who is making the most of their early “4th act years”. That person is my father.

In November my father turned 93. He still lives in his own home with my mother (who is 89 and on the cusp of her 4th act), still drives occasionally, is fully present both mentally and physically, and follows world events with real intention. He is an ongoing example to me of what is possible when you take care of yourself. As I have been saying all along, I am fully aware that we cannot know when we might get “the diagnosis”, however as much as it is up to us, we can take responsibility for our health and well-being.

I asked my father recently how he stays in such good physical condition. He showed me the exercise routine that he does every day. When I asked him how long he had been doing this he answered, “Oh I don’t know, about 25 years”. Twenty five years! Wow, that’s a long time to be doing something that regularly. He also told me that he uses the rowing machine in his condo’s exercise room. Again my question was, “how often”? His answer, as could be expected, “every day”. I told him that in a recent study, the “rowing machine” came out as one of the very best exercises we could do for overall physical mobility. He seemed pleased to know that what he had been doing for a long time was somehow confirmed by science. A few years ago he had to go into the hospital to have his gall bladder removed. It was the first time, other than visiting people in a hospital that he had ever been in one. The doctors were amazed at how “young” his body was and he was in and out in three days.

I write this because my father is one of those quiet, gentle folks who will never step too far out of his comfort zone. That means that he will never enter the kind of events that Ida Keeling is becoming famous for. And yet, here he is, in his own way, flying the flag for living an engaged and healthy life right into his 4th act. He doesn’t know anything about these “acts” that I am talking about. In many ways, I think he could care less. He simply wants to live well for as long as he can.

I believe that my father is a good example of someone who is taking the long view while being keenly aware that his clock is older than it once was. He often reminds me that “things could start breaking down any time”, and I know that he means that. Still, he presses into each day; doing his exercises, pulling on the rowing machine, walking what seems to be many, many kilometres, grateful that he is doing so well. I am proud of him. Earlier I mentioned my mother. She is on the cusp of entering her 4th act and this year she was diagnosed with diabetes. Upon receiving this news, my mother took on the challenge, reconfigured her diet and exercise routine and is now living medication free. Once again, she knows that could change, however her willingness to not give in is a walking demonstration to me (and to her doctor) that even at 89 someone can change their lives for the better.

So may it be said of us, too, that no matter what act we are in, we can lean into life, doing all that we can to be examples of what it means to live well.

Onward….

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Taking the Long View – Part 2

In my last post I wrote about the importance of “Taking the Long View” by which I mean, not allowing yourself to get caught up in short term thinking, such that you are unable to imagine adding to your life those things that take a long time to master. I believe that this is an important idea especially since we live in a world that seems to constantly bombard us with the notion that we “can have it all”, and we “can have it all right now”. This of course is false, as we intuitively know that most things take time to achieve. Even so, it is difficult to live outside that system. Taking the long view can help with that, I think.

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Taking the Long View

The summer hiatus is coming to an end and I now find myself just over half way through the first year of my third act. I once heard a quote from one of the first Apollo astronauts who said, “Without events to mark it, there is no such thing as time”. I think what he means is that as we move along in our lives, it is important to pause along the way and see what kind of progress is being made. Otherwise how will we even know we are in time? What are we experiencing? How are we growing? How are we doing as compared to what we were hoping for? Without such reflection we tend to drift along, hoping to accomplish the things that we set out to do and often, not really getting that far. Perhaps a paraphrase of this would be: “If we do not set any goals, we never know if we are getting somewhere”.

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Saying ‘thanks’ to JT

Earlier this week my wife and I went to see James Taylor and his outstanding band, and it was fantastic. At 68 years old James is still as great a singer/songwriter/performer in his third act as he was in his first. Same silky voice, same “aw shucks” stage demeanour, same gracious engagement with his band and audience, same energy. A great example of what is possible in “the third act”. I have never met James Taylor and yet I owe a lot to him. Here’s why.

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It’s Official…

“This is the year that I turn 60”.

I wrote those words in my first blog and this event is the reason that I started this conversation about “the Third Act” in the first place. Well, it is official now as this month I actually celebrated my 60th birthday. It was a bit of a non-event actually. Not because we did not celebrate it; we did celebrate it after all with a wonderful stay in the beautiful Rocky Mountains. And not because I felt that “no one remembered” because I received some of the most endearing cards and letters that I could have ever expected. No, it was more of a non-event emotionally because I had decided to “turn 60 in my mind”, months before the actual date. My decision to do so brings into focus some of the research that comes out of the neuroscience labs that inform us that if we can “bring the target closer”, “get started on the goal sooner”, it gives us a sense of momentum and we feel like we are much farther along the way. That’s how I feel.

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Staying Curious and Watching Life Self-Organize

One of the great things about getting older is that, if you choose to, you can start to relax a bit. In the first and second acts, it seems to me a person spends so much time trying to figure things out, trying to decide whether to go “this way or that way”, spending all kinds of energy being anxious about a whole lot of things. I know I did. Over the past years something good (at least I think it is good) has been happening to me. I have stopped wondering why certain things are happening and instead I have allowed myself to accept the unusual and interesting ways that life “self-organizes”. The concept of “self-organization” is central to the description of biological systems. I certainly don’t pretend to understand much of this. I simply love the idea that life in general, which includes of course, my specific life, “self-organizes”.

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Staying Calm, and the Rest of the Story

By the time a person reaches “the third act” you would think that they should have enough life experience to handle challenging situations with an advanced degree of peace and well-being. We have seen our share of challenging situations after all. Even so, I have to report that when it comes to certain challenging situations (read “technology updates” here), I have limited tolerance. This intolerance was much more acute in my second act and, although certain people may disagree, I believe that I’m quite a bit better now than I used to be. It was in this belief (that I am much better now) that I continued my journey into the new world of Windows 10. Would I be exiting purgatory or was I headed straight into Dante’s Inferno? It had to be the former given the ongoing, warm messaging telling me that everything went so well and that “everything” was “exactly” where I had left it. No matter how skeptical I may have been in the past I was “ready”…

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The Priority of Learning, and Upgrading to Windows 10

I believe that a key component to staying engaged in “the third act” is a willingness to keep learning. There is so much to learn after all and with all of the available possibilities, it takes some serious reflection time to figure out what to tackle next. It’s fun to review the options especially when the topic fits into the category of “fun” or “interesting”. There are however other topics that one “must” learn and some of these topics clearly do not fit into the category of “fun” or “interesting”. And so it was with this understanding (that not all learning is fun or interesting) that I braced myself and decided to begin my 2016 learning journey by stepping into the experience of upgrading my computer to Windows 10. After all, “how hard could it be”?

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The “Third Act”

This is the year that I turn 60 and for reasons that are not entirely clear to me, I have been looking forward to this “event” for some time now. There is just something about this milestone that has me excited. I am in a mindset that is anticipating the future. I remember when I was about to turn 50 I did not feel the same way. Then, I saw the whole thing as somewhat negative. I actually remember thinking something like this, “I’ve lived 50 years, now the timeline is “somewhat less”.

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